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Thursday, November 29, 2012

043 Learning to Cope

Yesterday, I talked about an awesome and encouraging surprise Jimmy has waiting for him in his office. Today I want to talk about coping with surprises that aren't so pleasant.

As Jimmy heals, he has several weeks off from work. For the first couple of weeks we have also chosen to have church through the simulcast at home so that Jimmy won't be exposed to sickness or have hundreds of people wanting to hug him (which would press up against his incisions which are still tender). Jimmy has been doing amazingly well in his healing but we have felt a little disconnected with what has been going on. Thankfully, Jimmy's boss and our pastor (Aaron) was sensitive to this and decided to drop by our house on Saturday night and bring us up to speed.

We didn't know that when Aaron came over he would be telling us that he and his family (who we love!) had accepted a new position in New Jersey and that they would be leaving near the end of December. We had no clue he would be announcing that the very next morning but we soon found out. We are SUPER happy for this great opportunity and new experience that God has brought to the Robb family. They are going to do amazing and hopefully love every minute of it. But what about us?

Anytime you experience something unexpected--especially job related--their is always a certain amount of fear, stress, and uncertainty that comes with it. Jimmy has had experiences similar to this before and they weren't the best. Of course that doesn't mean it is going to be that way at McCarthy. The big question is what will we do? How will we handle it?

In the past, it would have been easy to turn to food. Although Jimmy is generally a "happy eater" there are times when it is easier to justify cheating because you are upset. That really isn't an option right now unless he wants to make himself really sick. I was impressed with Aaron's sensitivity when he told us that he waited until now to tell us so that Jimmy wouldn't be tempted to cheat on his two week liquid diet (which would have been very possible). There will be a time in the future when the fear of getting sick won't be there so it's important to take the time now to learn new methods of coping.

Hands down, the hardest part of losing weight (naturally or surgically assisted) and keeping it off is changing your mindset and habits. If you don't bother to change your patterns, behaviors, or habits then it won't matter if you had surgery or not because you will eventually find a way to put the weight back on. Losing weight is about changing your mind just as much if not more than changing your body.

After the initial shock passed, it was much easier to see how amazing this whole thing could be for everyone involved. We love and will dearly miss the Robb family but we know that God is sending them to New Jersey for a reason. We are also thankful that we get to use this experience to start retraining our minds now so that when other coping situations come along later they will be much easier to handle!

Aaron, Dana, Caleb, Kelsey, & Katie, Thank you for being an amazing part of our lives! You all will always be a part of us and part of the family of our heart. May God richly bless you in all that He has called you to do!

Grace and Peace,


  1. Do you guys like jigsaw puzzles? I know that was a good stress reliever for me when I was relearning how to cope...and reading ALL the time. I took up kids series books - I've got a whole list if these are things that Jimmy would be interested in. I think I checked out a hundred or so books that first year.

    1. We definitely love to read. We don't have many puzzles but we do like to do them.

  2. I started walking or drawing when I got stressed out. Helped me work things out in my head without diving for the french fries.

    1. Walking is a really good idea. Jimmy likes to listen to music (not much of an artist) too.